ALT.com – BDSM dating, Fetish & Kink Site – Review

Alternative, Erotic Sex Dating for the BDSM, Bondage and Fetish Community BDSM dating, Fetish and Kink Site Reviewed

ALT is a sister site to Adultfriend Finder (AFF). It’s been around since 1998 and claims two millions members worldwide. It bills itself as more “specialist”, more niche, than AFF in that it’s targeted specifically for the alternative lifestyle i.e. the BDSM crowd.

That’s not to say you don’t get a lot of BDSM activities listed in the “Likes” section of AFF, and there is some crossover of profiles on both sites (like myself, some people maintain a profile on both) but ALT is generally speaking more “hardcore” and you don’t have to hold back when you send a message on that site!

Well… still within the bounds of some social decorum, that is. What I mean is, unlike AFF, you don’t have to step too lightly for fear that the person you’re speaking to might regard your particular sexual peccadilloes as cause to run for the hills and block you – you can pretty much just straight-up say what genuinely floats your boat. Provided it isn’t illegal, just pitch it and see who bites.

That’s what you’ve signed-up for. No one on ALT is looking for vanilla.

Except the fake profiles that you can easily spot as the woman seem to always be featured in wholesome pics and have a profile that seems totally out of place, talking about finding their “true love” or some such other happy horse shit.

Those profiles will respond, but they’ll always immediately want your email as they don’t use the site much, and want to chat privately.

Don’t fall for that. It’s just a scam to get your email so they can sell it on, and you’ll only get your inbox spammed to heck.


ALT Memberships

There’s two types of membership on ALT, silver and gold. I’ve been a member under both.

There’s not that much difference between the two. If you sign-up under silver you can’t contact new members for a period of three days or so – which is a bit of a niggle but if you’re patient, not so much of a problem.

You don’t have access to certain videos and groups as well, and you can’t view member’s profile pics in full size.
Again, niggles, not really deal breakers.

However, they were niggles enough that I upgraded my membership to gold in order to get full access to the site.

Some profile pics are a bit fuzzy at the smaller size or you want to take a closer, or have a better, look etc. Maybe even save off the image. You can’t do that as a silver member.

Also it can become frustrating seeing the “Featured” section, a new face, and clicking “message” only to be told you have to wait a few days to contact that member.

So I upgraded. I thought it worth the extra just to get full run of the site and maximise my membership.

And like on AFF, you get the option to add-on the ability to allow non-members to read your messages and reply. If you don’t, you still can message these women, but they won’t be able to read anything you send or reply. So a waste of time in other words without it.

There’s a lot of free members profiles (as you might expect) so it can be worthwhile to take that option. I did with both AFF and ALT and so did our own notoriously tight Dodgy Dave. Again, it was about maximising what the site had to offer, and getting the most out of it.

You don’t need to be a gold member to take that option either, you have access to it under a silver membership as well.


Your Profile

Take some time to fill it out. Say what you’re into but don’t sound like Ed Gein doing it. Remember this is supposed to be fun and you don’t want to sound like anyone runs the risk of actual harm in meeting you. Intense is okay; creepy is not.

It may be ALT but there is still some social dance to this; the social niceties aren’t totally thrown out of the window. So like I said in my review of AFF, don’t get carried away and allow your enthusiasm to paint you as a sex pest.

Pictures are good. Everyone likes to see who they’re speaking and profiles with photos do get better engagement – same way you’re more likely to check out a profile.

I didn’t include face shots initially, I admit. I used some torso shots to show my physique… then realised that just about all the female profiles I was contacting had face pics and no one seemed to much care about anonymity. So I added a couple mugshots too.

What the hell – I’m not married, I’m getting too old to care who sees me, and anyone who does that recognises me, well they’re on that site too. I’m going to enjoy myself in this life, not worry about the hypocritical, insecure ridicule of anyone else. So I added some face pics to my profile.

But no dick pics. They’re in abundance on ALT, believe me, and you’re being more clichéd than risqué to include them.

I’ve also read female profiles ridiculing the guys who use obvious swipes taken from sites featuring guys better blessed by nature, and trying to pass off these shots as themselves.

Don’t do that. If you’re going to do dick pics, at least make them your own.

As for their effect…. I don’t know if they help or hinder to be honest. You’ll come across plenty profiles where the women state not to send them, or will ignore you if you feature them on your profile, but even more don’t make mention of it. A few even request them. Me, as I say, I don’t do them, but up to you: you won’t be in a minority if you do.

Fill out the “Likes” section, too, re what you’re into and how much. You can search on these activities so worth taking the time, and it gives folks an idea where your limits are and what kinks you’re into.

Some of the profile questionnaires seem a bit too involved. You’re joining an adult dating site, not providing a medical or mental health record, and I didn’t fill them all out, but I completed two or three, and as I say, I think it’s worth taking the time to do it.


Dating on ALT

Unless you’re in a big city then be prepared to travel.

Within reason. Me, I’m in the UK so anything within the mainland, I was down for.

I wasn’t for travelling to Europe or across the ocean, but anywhere domestically with a well-served airport or good rail link, I would consider going to i.e. any major city.

That also really opens your options on ALT, too. If you insist on staying within, say, a twenty-five radius of where you live, you may not find too much action. So spread your wings, fan out a bit, and be adventurous 😉

The women, as you might imagine, are a mixed bag… but so is every dating site of whatever flavour.

The reality is though, that you’re not looking for a relationship, but to get your fetishes sated, so again this allows you a bit more leeway. Maybe you wouldn’t seriously date some of these women, but you’d certainly fuck ’em.

And that’s what they’re on ALT for too. Aside from the fake profiles, no one’s looking for love and marriage.

In reality, ALT has as many different types and ages of women as any traditional dating site, but on ALT it’s more honest about what folks are really looking for.

And you might be surprised to read just what some of them women are into as well: urine play, needles, breath restriction… there’s a whole swathe of fun perversions activities to choose from.

You might note too, that creampie certainly, and impregnation fetishes, are to be found on ALT 😉 There’s breeding and other associated groups as well, that you’ll have access to as a gold member.

Pretty much whatever kinky shit you’re into, you’ll find on ALT.

But you’ll have to put a bit of time and effort into it. You can’t just sign-up and sit back. So be prepared to surf the site most evenings and see what it has to offer. That’s not such a chore: it’s fun and can be quite addictive in its own way.

Just one word of caution, like AFF, you’ll find the female “VIP” profiles will often send you a wink or “flirt” but I reckon they’re mostly either site employees or bots manning these, as they never reply if you contact them on the basis of that (supposed) sign of interest. So if you decide to become a full member, don’t do it on the basis of thinking one of those women is actually, genuinely, interested in you – or you’ll be disappointed.

When it comes to the quality of the sex to be had from ALT, that’s something that’s going to be different for everyone.

One thing I will say though, is that it usually takes to the second or third meet before it becomes really enjoyable and as you’d hoped.

Why? Because no matter how much you message and sext and chat on the phone, there will still be a distance between you when you finally meet, and it takes a bit of time around each other to get comfortable and relax.
There’s just no circumventing that. That doesn’t mean that your first meet won’t be fun, but it does mean your subsequent meets (with the same person) will be even better.

You don’t know someone till you’ve met them.


Cancelling Membership

Cancelling your membership is easy. You don’t have any hoops to jump through and I’ve never had trouble with them billing when they’re not supposed to, or over-billing. It’s an established, legit site, and won’t rip you off in that way.

You might feel ripped-off if you don’t get laid or as much engagement as you’d like, but me, I did okay on the site, but it’s different for everyone.

When I say “okay” I mean I got a couple meets and a lot of chat but whenever I join – and I dip in and out – I usually do for at least two months. It’s not a pay-your-money and get immediately laid type of deal, so don’t sign-up thinking you’re going to have beautiful sex freaks blowing up your inbox and back flipping onto your dick, all before the end of the week: be realistic.

Meaning you’re going to do a lot of mailing and only a fraction will reply, and of them, only a handful will get to anywhere near meeting.

However, let’s be honest, that’s the same of all dating sites, adult themed or not.

And like all dating sites there’ll be dead profiles, scammers, time wasters, attention seekers, free members who can’t acknowledge you (which is why I say to sign-up for the option that allows them to) etc.

But it’s fun, there’s real women on it of a similar mind to you, and I can vouch you can certainly get laid from it.


Recommendation

Yes, I would recommend ALT. It’s the same but different to AFF. It’s a little more expensive, I think because it’s billed as one level deeper than AFF and thus more “specialist”, but the sites share a lot of the same layout and features, just in different colour schemes.

You can join for free, no credit card required, and have a look around. You can still see profiles and their list picture but you won’t be able to read the full profile description, just the hover summary available if you put your mouse arrow over it.

Worth signing-up for the free membership at least I reckon, and from there you can get a taste and see if it’s for you before deciding whether to go gold or silver.

And tell us in Comments how you got on.

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